January 10, 2025<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Whenever I asked David for advice or I was in the throws of some hand wringing situation, he always said \u201cjust concentrate on doing the next right thing and that is the only thing you have to do right now\u201d This concept comes from psychiatrist Carl Yung and was adopted by the recovery community and co-dependents alike as a way to center awareness in times of inner trouble. \u00a0David practiced this in times of anxiety and depression and anytime he felt helpless to a situation. I was never as good as he was at doing it because my next question was always “what is the next right thing though?” he always patiently encouraged me to figure it out. I know I was (am) exasperating but he never ever showed a moment of irritation with me. It is sound advice and I keep hearing him say it to me over and over each time I find myself sitting here in tears begging \u201cDavid, what do I do? How do I keep going without you?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
David and I never got around to seeing the movie Frozen 2 but as I was remembering the origin of this phrase I stumbled across a song from that movie called The Next Right Thing<\/a>. Reading the lyrics just now, I have to wonder how it is that I am just seeing this for the first time right now. I thought obviously these words were written by someone who has been through a grief like this and a quick search confirmed that. <\/p>\n\n\n\n David was big on saying no matter how you felt, get up and shower. Even if you could not manage to do anything else after that. He preached this over and over to himself, me, and SL through various times in our lives. More recently, on days when he was weak and did not feel like getting off the couch, I would encourage him to do as he told us and he eventually would because he was smart enough to follow his own advice. Some days he didn’t have the energy to shower until 9pm but he never gave up on himself and trying to do the next right thing. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Today, I am in a struggle to move. I was awake until the light broke this morning. I don\u2019 t have any direction from \u201cthe only star that guided me\u201d. I am drifting, so when I asked him what to do. This is what came back to me today. So, I got up and fed the cats. Then I took a shower. So far, that is it for today. David would say that is plenty for now. \u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n