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How I Am

January 21, 2025 Sometimes I have ideas about things to write about and other times I just sit down and start pecking out words in no order just because the silence here is deafening now. Just putting all the thoughts…

A Trip Without You

January 17-19, 2025 SL, Adam and I decided to take a quick trip up the cabin in Blue Ridge where David and I spent so many wonderful days and made the sweetest memories doing everything from exploring the towns, light…

Leaky Faucet and Leakier Eyes

January 15, 2025 Today the tub faucet started to leak. The cold side it seemed. You taught me how to do this before and after the diagnosis. I didn’t want to know how or think about ever having to do…

Uncomfortable Grief

January 14, 2025 Dear David, My writing is helpful to me, but it seems to be upsetting people who are able to read it. I don’t think people are comfortable with raw emotions. I write what I feel. I had…

Nights with Elephant Memories

Nights are long and difficult. Nights are when time hangs heavy. I used to live for getting on my pjs and jumping into bed between the cool sheets and warm blanket and snuggling up next to David whether he came…

Doing the Next Right Thing

January 10, 2025 Whenever I asked David for advice or I was in the throws of some hand wringing situation, he always said “just concentrate on doing the next right thing and that is the only thing you have to…

What Do I Do

January 9, 2025 What do I do when I have a gazillion things I want and need to tell David all throughout the day because that is what we did. We talked about everything and nothing. All day long. What…

Signs

January 9, 2024 Signs are everywhere telling us where to go or what not to do. People say there are also signs sent to us from loved ones that have transitioned to that other plane. Some say God sends signs…

Eulogy for My Own Heart

January 7, 2025 Well David, even cheering from heaven, you and the big guy couldn’t make them Falcons win on Sunday. But it was at least close and as you have said for the past seven years since we last…

An Obituary for Mr. William David Gassett

Mr. William David Gassett age 49, passed away on January 3, 2025, at his residence.  Memorial services for Mr. Gassett will be held on Tuesday, January 7, 2025, at 2:00 PM, in the chapel of Fletcher-Day Funeral Home. Rev. Ted…

A Not So Happy New Year

December 30, 2024-January 1, 2025 The start of the week found David struggling a little to speak. He was sleepy and it was difficult for him to stay awake. On Monday, he ate a really good breakfast although he had…

Skipping Ahead to the End of This Week’s Chapter

December 29, 2024 We saw numerous doctors and consultants and heads of departments. David was poked and prodded and drained and filled with fluids. We survived may sleepless nights and days. Three Emory oncologists reviewed his entire record including digging…

An Answer from St. Joseph

From 12/20 to 12/24, David’s WBC continued to rise with one day seeing it decrease only slightly. His feet and legs continued to swell and Lasix and Aldactone were added to the broad spectrum antibiotics he was receiving. Dsvid continured…

Afternoon Update

December 19, 20024 David slept most of the day but he did have a little bit of confusion and agitation today. His ammonia level is high and that can cause a number of things to happen including hepatic encephalopathy which…

And then…

About 20 minutes later David had soaked his sheets, pillow and hospital gown with sweat, left a rather noxious stool sample in the bathroom, and had one of his IVs blow out. He also started on the first unit of…

Scary Today

We had a scary weekend and a scarier Monday morning. When we got up today, David was disoriented and having trouble getting out his words. He was having trouble holding things like a water bottle or his phone and kept…

Highs and Lows

December 14, 2024 On Tuesday evening, 12/10, David’s temperature started to spike again. We went back and forth with acetaminophen for a few hours but did not call the oncologist on call. David and I both felt like this was…

B Positive When Getting O Negative

December 6, 2024 We got to URMC right at 7am on this balmy 28 degree morning. Man, it was cold! We went right in to the treatment room and got started with the preliminaries. Guess what? Nurse said right off…

Type and Cross Match

December 5, 2024 We went to URMC today and got the type match done for the blood transfusion. It didn’t take long for registration and to run down to the lab. He got his red wrist band, and we went…

Apppointment: Oncology Labs

December 4, 2024 David had a telehealth therapy appointment this morning. He has not been back to in-person since his WBC was so low just as a precaution. He doesn’t like the telehealth as well but he likes not having…

Ensure a Boost

December 3, 2024 I had asked to speak to one of the dieticians from Piedmont concerning David’s dietary needs since he lost a few pounds between visits. I was able to make contact today and we discussed more protein, high…

A Daughter’s Reflection

November 29, 2024 We had the funeral for my Dad today. David was not feeling up to coming to visitation, but SL brought him in time for the service. It was a nice service as far as funerals go. Lots…

Chemo to the Third Power

November 27, 2024 Today another day of Etoposide so another short day. We ate our snacks and basically watched the clock tick down before we were back on the way home. The funeral home said Dad was ready to see,…

Chemo Squared

November 26, 2024 I got up early for a grocery pick up and stopped at the pharmacy to refill my anxiety meds. Those are working overtime today. I also took a ride to the cemetery where my dad will rest…

Chemo Round II

Monday, November 25, 2024 It was a short night. Not much sleep for me, but we got up and got going with some breakfast and a shower to make it to Fayetteville by 9.  David was moving slowly and having…

The Hits Keep Coming

Sunday, November 24, 2024 My Dad died today. He was 78 but it was unexpected. I wasn’t ready.  It is an immense loss yet to be quantified.  I am standing on the verge of intense grief but at the same…

Since the Hospital Stay…

David sleeps most of the day and night. We have only had one or two temp spikes and they were low level around 100. He woke up sweating this past Saturday morning while napping and had to change his shirt…

Next Up, Low BP

November 6, 2024 This morning’s surprise was David moving slower than usual and almost as if he were in slow motion. I took his BP and it was 94/54 which was very low for him. He could not stay awake,…

A Message to Dr. B

November 4, 2024 I just keep getting more anxious and worried about we are supposed to do with these temp spikes, so I messaged Dr. B today via the patient portal to update him on the weekend developments. I uploaded…

Falcons Fever?

November 3, 2024 David woke me up at 1am this morning and said he was sweating. His tshirt was soaked around the neck. I took his temp and it was 101.5. He took some Tylenol and went back to sleep.…

Chemo Fever?

November 2, 2024 David got up this morning with a temp of 101.7. I gave him some rapid release Tylenol and he took all his other morning meds. Knowing we are supposed to call the oncologist’s office for temps over…

Treatment: Chemo the Remix: Day 2

October 29, 2024 David got up feeling pretty good today. Remembering back to last year (by looking through my journals), chemo days were some of his best days. It is the recovery weeks that weren’t so nice. He said he…

Treatment: Chemo the Sequel: Day 1:

October 28, 2024 We drove over to Fayetteville around lunch to make his 1:00 therapy appointment. It was cloudy and overcast and we felt the same. We did enjoy the changing color of the leaves along the way though. The…

Appointment: Chemo Patient Education

October 25, 2024 We had a call this morning to go over the protocol and side effects of the upcoming chemo. Like before, David will receive Dexamethasone and Akyenzeo prior to each chemo IV in an effort to minimize the…

Appointment: Oncology

October 24, 2024 The nurse told him he didn’t have to have his port accessed today and could opt for a regular blood draw. He jumped at the chance to skip the port. He is so tired of having it…

Appointment: Oncology

October 10, 2024 David saw one of the PAs at Dr. B’s office for his appointment this morning. He had labs as usual and she asked him how he felt he was doing since the Y90 on 9 He said…

Procedure: Y90: The Sequel

September 30, 2024 We made it through Hurricane Helene unscathed but our Georgia neighbors to the south and east of us and some of the Tennessee and North Carolina mountain areas were not so fortunate. It has been distressing seeing…

Fe Infusion

September 25, 2024 I checked in with Dr. W’s office around 11am this morning to see if there was news on an iron infusion. A nurse called back to say he had been working on the insurance since 8am this…

Scheduling-More Y90

On the way to David’s appointment today, he got a call regarding the next part of the Y90 procedure. He is scheduled for Monday, 9 We will be back at Piedmont Fayette at 7am. This part of the procedure will…

Appointment-Dr. J Palliative Care

September 9, 2024 Today we went to Atlanta to meet Dr. J, the supportive medicine doctor, in person. He explained that when prescribing opioids, the doctor is required to see the patient regularly and in person throughout the usage to…

Appointment: Oncology

August 19, 2024 We saw Dr. B this morning. He walked in asking why David did not have an appointment yet for the y90 procedure and wondered what the hold up was on Dr. K’s end. David told him he…

Abiding

August 13, 2024 We left a message on Monday with Dr. J’s office as he asked reminding him to call Dr. B about the pain medication change and did not receive a call back.  I called Dr. B’s office on…

Tumor Board Recommendation & Going Forward

July 17, 2024 Dr. N called David today and explained that the tumor board did not recommend additional liver surgery. He said they looked at the scans and recommended going back to chemo and looking at clinical trials. We never…

Scheduling Scans

The CT scan Dr. K ordered for David’s liver was already scheduled and Dr. N’s office called and spoke to the Imaging department at the hospital to try to get a lung scan done at the same time. They said…

Appointment: Oncology with Dr. B

June 14, 2024 David saw Dr. B today for blood work and discussion regarding the recent PET scan results. They flushed his port while we were there also. The longer the port goes without use, the harder it seems to…

Appointment: PET Scan

May 31, 2024 David had a PET scan today at Piedmont Imaging in Atlanta. He was called back and given the Dotatate tracer just as he was for the PET in February.  He went into the little room to wait…

Stepped up Vacation & Scheduling

May 8, 2024 We had planned to make our annual beach visit in the next two weeks but after seeing Dr. B on Monday, we decided to move up the trip while we were waiting on an appointment. We always…

Appointment: Radiation Follow-up

April 30, 2024 We saw Dr. Wa today for a 4 week follow up visit after radiation. Dr. Wa was very encouraging regarding the CT abdominal scan on April 2. He showed us a side-by-side comparison of the tumor and…

Ringing Out

March 28, 2024 Last day of radiation. David had his final treatment, and we also got to see the doctor for discharge from treatment. Dr. Wa was not in so we saw Dr. G. He said there was a 4…

Radiation Week 6

March 25, 2024 Boy were glad to see the start of the final week of radiation. We got to the office and noticed more people in the waiting room than usual. We waited a bit and then one of the…

Radiation Week 5

March 18, 2024 4 weeks down. 2 weeks to go. Another Monday another start of a week of radiation. We saw Dr. Wa today. David told him he didn’t feel very well this past weekend. He was also experiencing a…

Happy Birthday to my Hanger of Moons

March 17, 2024 Today is David’s birthday. He was born on a mild March Monday on St. Patrick’s Day in 1975, and while there doesn’t seem to be any ancient Celtic or Gaelic legends about St. Patrick’s Day babies being…

The Probing Ides of March

March 15, 2024 After treatment this morning, David had the cone down scan to prepare for the radiation boost that will start on Monday 3 He said it was similar to the first planning scan he had when he was…

Radiation “Weak” 4

March 11, 2024 Week 4 of radiation and it is Monday again, so we saw Dr. Wa after treatment for a weekly check-in. We discussed David’s pain level and the upcoming in office cone down scan for the radiation boost…

RAD End Week 2. Start Week 3

March 4, 2024 Day 11 of Radiation Camp and Mondays are see-the-doctor-day. Since Dr. Wa was out of the office, we saw Dr. G. He checked in with David about symptoms he is experiencing including urinary issues and increased pain.…

GA 68 & NETs

February 29, 2024 David had another PET scan today at Piedmont Atlanta Imaging. When we last saw Dr. N for the post op checkup on February 13, we received the pathology on the two tumors that were removed from David’s…

Chemo Daze

I started and stopped this entry so many times due to the humor. Some days I can find the humor in everything and other days, I just feel so defeated and sad. Sad isn’t a big enough word but that…

Everybody Hurts…sometimes

Since we got home from the hospital, David has been walking up and down the driveway throughout the day to keep moving and keep potential blood clots at bay. He is eating when he doesn’t feel like it. He is…

Post-op Follow-up

February 13, 2023 David saw Dr. N today for his post-op follow-up appointment. Dr. N said the incision looked good and was healing nicely. He told David it would be healed up just in time for bikini season. He advised…

Doctorspeak

February 8 & 9, 2024 On 2/8 we saw Dr. B the Med Onc. We discussed the best time to begin the radiation/chemo treatments. Because chemo can stop the healing process, it was decided by Dr. B and Dr. N,…

An ok Day

February 7, 2024 David said he felt pretty ok today. He slept most of the night. He had some initial trouble getting on and off the couch this morning but he figured it out. Remembering he can’t bend down to…

Piedmont Atlanta

This is a large hospital in the middle of downtown Atlanta. It is the oldest hospital in Atlanta. I took some pictures when I walked down to grab dinner one night. Older parts of the hospital are still there but…

Happy Hour

Day 3 A.S. February 5, 2024 Right off, very early this morning, we started hearing chatter that we might get to leave. How is it that everyone in the hospital knows before the patient? Even the housekeeper said she thought…

Warm Temps and Icy Attitudes

February 4, 2024 David and I did some more walking around the halls this morning and noticed these 10 ft markers on the the baseboards. We guessed they had something to do with measuring how far someone walked, but I…

About Last Night…

February 3, 2024 Day 2 A.S. – Evening We had not slept well the night of surgery, so I went over to the hotel late morning and slept for about an hour while David tried to snooze back at the…

Morning Report and Alligators

February 4, 2024 Day 2 A.S. – 6:30 am Lights in the room won’t go off completely due to some issues with the switch. So, we have been “sleeping” like the sun was on. So last night we got them…

Nursing Chronicles

February 3, 2023 Day 1 After Surgery (A.S.) If you have ever stayed at a hospital resort with a loved one well you already know how the night went. What kind of Valerian Steel are the hinges on the doors…

Area 51

February 2, 2024 After surgery-afternoon/evening Where did we leave off? Oh yes…me having to pee. So, the recovery nurse called to let me know the room number and what I heard was “5 South 81”. I said can you repeat…

You Already Know the Phone Rang

Finally had to get up before my water broke. Packed up my stuff. Got my well organized bag together and headed to the restroom. Nurse called. She said in this order and I quote… Hi. This is Nurse D and…

Brittany Called

Post-Op Recovery-12:00 pm Nurse Brittany called to say David was doing ok and relaxing. She said he told her he just “felt a little sore”. I advised her of his self proclaimed fantastic humor. She said mmm-hmmm. She said she…

deLIVERance

February 2, 2024 Surgery-10:30 Dr. N came out and sat down next to me. I am sitting right at the door where the surgeons leave. My first thought when I saw him out of the corner of my eye was…

The Patient is Doing Well

Surgery Day-8:56 am I got a text saying, “patient is doing well”. Surgery began around 8:07. It is expected to last around 3 hours. His gallbladder will be removed because it sits in the way of the liver plus, he…

More-er-est

February 2, 2024 Surgery Day Morning We slept pretty well considering. We were up before the chickens around 3:30 am to shower and head down to the hospital. When I got out of the shower, he was sitting on the…

A Well Oiled Machine

February 1, 2024 We are back in Atlanta today for pre-op. I spent last night packing bags and unpacking bags not knowing what to bring. I used different bags for his things he would need in the hospital room. Things…

Salvageable

January 30, 2024 Today, David saw Dr. Wa to discuss radiation following the liver resection surgery. Personable and enthusiastic as ever, Dr. Wa agreed that we are on the right path. He said once chemotherapy becomes less effective it is…

Lung Time No See

January 27, 2024 CT-Lungs David and I went for his lung CT early this morning. We were thankful that Dr. B’s scheduler was able to get him in so quickly. It was a quick scan without contrast just to check…

The Cellular Saboteur

January 26, 2024 We saw Dr. B today. He confirmed what we already read from the scans. The last two rounds of chemo had less effect than we had hoped. Dr. B explained that sometimes refractory disease occurs during chemotherapy…

Hepatic Dialogs

January 24, 2024 David had an appointment with Dr. N today at Piedmont Atlanta to discuss the liver scan. He confirmed there was indeed a second lesion as he had previously noted with the scan on December 6. Dr. N…

MRI Chronicles: Episode 34

January 23, 2024 Rectal MRI David had the second MRI today. This one lasted around an hour. Results will tell us what effects the most recent rounds of chemo may have had on the tumor. He said he got to…

Maybe Sharing is Caring

The Care Bears and I go way back to the 1980s but I never quite mastered both parts of the sharing thing that Share Bear tried to teach. I mean, I shared my toys when I was little, I share…

Eeyore Days

I caught a wave tonight that I couldn’t handle, and it took me under. Since this started, I find myself being angry much of the time. Thinking about unfairness and why David. Why us? Why now? And just plain why?…

New Year, More Chemo and the Falcons

January 5, 2024 New year. Same Cancer. Back at Chemo today. We were not in the mood to do this today. We grumbled all morning. I think sometimes we just want to be angry and sad and irritated and maybe…

More Chemo-stry

December 22, 2023 Another chemo day. We saw the PA for this visit and labs. We really like seeing the PA just as much as Dr. B. He is so patient. He listens and answers every question we have even…

A Hitch in Our Giddy-up

December 8, 2023 David had a scheduled appointment to meet with Dr. B to discuss the rectal scan part of the MRI. On the way to the appointment, David received a call from Dr. N saying surgery had been cancelled.…

Bear Down

December 6, 2023 David had two MRIs at Piedmont Atlanta. He was in the machine for 2 hours and 45 minutes. He said it was very long and very exhausting. This was David’s first rectal MRI scan so that was…

Pole Dancing

David had chemo on October 16th & 30th  and November 13th. On the November 13th chemo appt, the PA told us that he was scheduling additional chemo appointments “just in case” they were needed. If the scans returned something unexpected,…

Livering No Stone Unturned

October 11, 2023 David was referred to a surgical oncologist at Piedmont Atlanta. Dr. N and his PA were both very personable and took plenty of time discussing options and answering our questions prior to sending David over for his…

Impatient Education

September 29, 2023 David had a patient education appointment that provided lots of information and what to expect with chemotherapy. It was a lot of information to absorb and we have a ton of reading to do. A LOT OF…

Ports Unknown

September 28, 2023 David reported to the hospital to undergo the procedure to implant a port in his chest. The procedure went fine and David was ready to go home shortly after lunch. PORTAL (-d) In hindsight, albeit unbeknown to…

Spidey Senses and Metastasis

September 22, 2023 Pet Scan After work on Thursday, we went up to Atlanta to stay close to the imaging center so we wouldn’t have the stress of getting up so early and then fighting ATL traffic. On Friday, we…

Sharpie Tattoo

September 20, 2023 David went to Dr. Wa today for a diagnostic test that targets the area for radiation therapy. Radiation is set to begin on September 27. He will have a total of 25 treatments once per day Monday-Friday…

Scheduling

September 12, 2023 Dr. Wa’s office scheduled an appointment for a diagnostic appointment on 9 This appointment will get David ready to start radiation therapy. We also got work from CVS Specialty pharmacy that the insurance approved the chemo drug…

Optional Options

September 6, 2023 David saw the medical oncologist (Dr. B) and his PA-C (C). We discussed history with C before seeing the doctor. Dr. B explained the process and confirmed any of the same things we had heard during previous…

Fe Man

August 25, 2023 We saw our PCP again. In preparation for the upcoming vist with the medical oncologist, Dr. W. ordered some blood work and prescribed iron supplements since David’s iron is still very low. He wanted to be sure…

Regarding Radiation

August 22, 2023 David saw a radiology oncologist (we will call him Dr. Wa since our PCP is also Dr. W).The nurse went over past history and asked many questions and then explained how radiation works. She said it would…

Early Connections

August 15, 2023 After a long and nearly sleepless night, we arrived at the hospital at 5:30 am. We checked in and sat down to wait. We had already been told that I would not be able to go with…

Fingers Crossed and Matching

August 14, 2023 David had to go over to the hospital to have his blood cross matched for surgery. Since his hemoglobin and iron counts were still low, this was a precaution in case blood was needed during surgery. Because…

Magnetic Personality

August 8, 2023 David went for a CT and MRI scan. He previously picked up the contrast he had to drink prior to the test and the day of the test. He said the CT went fine and the MRI…

“It is Cancer”

July 18, 2023 We arrived for the colonoscopy at 12:30. They took him back for the procedure at 1:11. They called me to come to recovery at 2:05. David was pale, irritated and in discomfort when I got there (he…

Prepping for Prep

July 17, 2023 David (and I) suffered through colonoscopy prep. Whew! CLEANED OUT (-d)There are words for this, but not words that I’m really willing to write about this. If you’ve heard stories, they’re most likely true. If they seem…

Gastro Talk

July 7, 2023 David had more blood work and then had an appointment with a gastroenterologist (Dr. G). We discussed the abnormal lab results and abdominal pain. He noted from the CT scan mild mural thickening of the rectosigmoid area…

Dogs Can’t Get MRIs but Cats Can

June 29, 2023 David had a CT (COMPUTED TOMOGRAPHY) (CAT scan) with contrast at our local hospital. Dr. W called with the results and explained the scan showed some thickening of the colon wall along with some diverticula. Proctitis was…

Match Game

June 27, 2023 David went to the local hospital to get blood crossmatch testing for a blood transfusion. This is done to ensure the donated blood is a match for the recipient. All blood has the same parts but not…

And so it begins…

On June 26, 2023, David saw his PCP (Dr. W) because he had been passing blood and had pelvic pain. He had also become intolerant of certain foods which was odd because he has always been able to eat anything.…

It is what it is until it isn’t

A little about what it is…. David and I have been together for 32 years and counting. Nearly 25 of those years are recorded in marital “bliss”. Like many in long lasting relationships, we have been through just about everything…